To Botox Or Not To Botox. Another One of Those Questions You’re Just Going To Have To Answer For Yourself!.

by Jan on November 30, 2010

As I was sitting amongst a group of women the other day, we chatted of relevant topics such as our current education system, social (in) security, changes in our insurance policies, the going’s on of our grown kids and… Botox. The subject of Botox somehow always seems to slip into conversations that include women both here and abroad. I highly doubt men talk of this subject, as those who indulge are most likely ‘closet injectors’.

So, discussions ensued as to the benefits of using Botox to smooth out those ever increasing epidermoid flaps and folds. Although tentative on broaching my personal experience with said topic, I would have been remiss not to share my Botox malady.

I have worked on-camera as a spokesperson and actress for several years and the advent of Botox was for me an opportunity to spend several more years as a liar…regarding my age of course.

I injected a little here a little there, playing blissfully with this new miracle of botulism like I was six again playing with my new Chatty Kathy at Christmas. I learned you could inject the Botox just above your upper lip giving it a more plump appearance. So to gain a more youthful pillowy mouth, I injected away. ‘Hoy Matey, thar she blows’ I expressed with wild abandon as within 7 to 10 days my upper lip did indeed swell to a more youthful and zestful appearance.

The only drawback I had not anticipated was that the muscles in the top of the mouth would be frozen and as I stood facing the camera ready to shoot a commercial, I was horrified when I could not form the letters m, b or p. My first line was, “Hi, Jan Brehm here with Mason Motors (name changed) celebrating this magical time of year”.  What I was able to dribble out was, “Hi, Jan reh here with ason otors, celerating this agical ti of year.” The director at first thought I was joking but his ‘ha ha’ quickly dissipated into raw frustration as camera take after camera take, I struggled to make my lips meet. I did finagle a way to move my lower lip up to meet the upper one, an accomplishment of which I was most pleased but unfortunately gave me the appearance of gurning.

Well, you think I would have learned, but a few weeks ago in preparing to shoot another commercial for a new dealership, I thought there would be no harm in Botoxing the bottom lip… again in attempts to regain a youthful lip-luster. I was fully aware that my bottom lip might be a bit paralyzed but found only the letters; f and v might be a bit strained. To my horror as I had not anticipated what the script might possibly say, I found my last line to be,  “Come visit us. We’re just off the I 5 freeway in Fife.” and of course what my facial orifice formed was, “Come isit us. We’re just o the I i eeway in i.”

I’m gonna cool it on the Botoxing for a while.

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