{"id":1091,"date":"2020-12-30T10:43:29","date_gmt":"2020-12-30T18:43:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.planetsweetpea.com\/blog\/?p=1091"},"modified":"2020-12-30T21:11:37","modified_gmt":"2020-12-31T05:11:37","slug":"i-need-a-resurrection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/i-need-a-resurrection\/","title":{"rendered":"I NEED A RESURRECTION"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Tomorrow I turn 67, and I have noticed an unsettling wafting its way into my aging age and now Covid filled days. It appears I\u2019m disappearing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what if I haven\u2019t worked since March.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what if I\u2019ve gained 8 pounds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what if I\u2019ve pulled a muscle that won’t unpull, and with the gyms closed, I have a great reason to not exercise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what if I\u2019m not connecting with people as much and the English language seems foreign.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what if I can\u2019t pull up the right words and say things like,\u201d I\u2019m using that doo-hicky to make that gooey stuff.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what if I have completely, absolutely NO recollection of booking two airline tickets back east that\u2019s leaving in 13 days\u2026!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As I age, I have found myself calmer and gloriously disconnected from all the crap that used to eat me up. Acceptance is empowering, and acceptance can be debilitating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Entering Covid, I went for long, lovely walks, ordered coffees and followed routes that offered bathrooms. I read, zoomed, cleaned, and rested. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Until I didn\u2019t. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Netflixed edged its way into every corner of my cranium and brought along friends, HBOmax, Amazon, Hulu, and Disney+. I stopped reading. I stopped connecting. I sat, puttered, and Old seized my joints and, much worse, my outlook on life. My perception of Me started to look like my mother when she turned beyond Senior Citizen into the Realm of the Elderly. She had her pants on backward and crumbs on her clothes and asked the same question repeatedly as I rolled my eyes and grit my teeth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Last night, I felt all tottery and withery. Watching a movie, I found I was clutching a blankie to my chest. Lumbering up the stairs for bedtime, I was heaven-slammed with a thought:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cRISE UP, WOMAN, AND TAKE THIS SPACE THAT\u2019S BEEN CREATED FOR YOU! THIS SPACE THAT NO ONE ELSE ON THIS EARTH CAN FILL!\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A breath so deep swallowed me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hey folks, guess what? I\u2019m not going down without a fight, one filled with acceptance of things I can\u2019t change, and total war against the things I can.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I must seize this day, or the day will seize me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My yoga mat is out. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s a good start.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tomorrow I turn 67, and I have noticed an unsettling wafting its way into my aging age and now Covid filled days. It appears I\u2019m disappearing. So what if I haven\u2019t worked since March. So what if I\u2019ve gained 8 pounds. So what if I\u2019ve pulled a muscle that won’t unpull, and with the gyms […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"yes","footnotes":""},"categories":[108,109,107,1,6,9,101,10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1091","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-aging","category-empty-nest-syndrome","category-for-the-woman","category-menopause","category-mid-life-madness","category-musings","category-road-blocks-and-detours","category-signs-symptoms"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1091"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1091"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1091\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1096,"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1091\/revisions\/1096"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1091"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1091"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/janbrehm.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1091"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}